"But haven't you ever thought about how you'd die if you ever had to kill yourself?"
"If I had to commit suicide, I'd prick my finger to get a few drops of blood and wave it about. For the scent of blood in the air attracts vampires like it attracts shark in the water. That's why I don't bathe if I have an open wound. Vampires will circle above my house like vultures after the scent. Once I find a sexy hot vampire, I will let her suck my blood dry."
"You know it's prob a lot messier and less romantic than the 'books' make it out to be"
"Nah, it'll be like having a huge mossi on your neck. I'd probably instinctually whack her on the head several times. Then I'd be like oh...sorry, keep going please."
